tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5612096309404583972024-03-12T21:30:58.915-07:00Priya Rana Kapoor BlogAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-5095966596539512672016-02-04T09:29:00.000-08:002016-02-04T09:30:57.307-08:00Celebrate Your Achievements<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Many people
just don’t take the time to stop and acknowledge what they have achieved. It
could be a very small accomplishment or a huge deal, but if we don’t stop and
take stock of it, we’re essentially telling ourselves that what we’ve done
doesn’t matter, that it’s not worthy of acknowledgement or celebration.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><o:p><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></o:p></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Now, I’m not
talking balloons and cake (well, not always) but some sort of private or
personal acknowledgement. Some people buy themselves a little trinket or that
fancy vacuum they’ve been coveting. Others get a massage or have that very
special glass of champagne with friends or co-workers.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The focus here
is to take the time to praise yourself. When the mind and body get that
positive reinforcement, they’ll like it and will want more. You’ll find it will
become easier to do whatever it is you’ve set your mind to because you’re kind
to yourself when you reach your goals or achievements.</span><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.gyspermission.com/coaching">www.GYSPermission.com/coaching</a></span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-71305299376098603252016-01-06T07:16:00.000-08:002016-01-06T07:16:56.964-08:00Jedi Mind Tricks
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jedi Mind
Tricks<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Star Wars is
probably one of my favourite films, and when working on intention, I often
suggest that my clients use Jedi mind tricks. This is in reference to the scene
in the film when the Stormtroopers are looking for two specific droids and
Obi-Wan Kenobi, a Jedi Knight, is able to deflect them simply by using the Jedi
mind tricks and saying with great conviction and influence, “These are not the
droids you are looking for.” Through his sureness alone, he’s able to convince
the Stormtroopers that it’s true, that those are not the droids they were
looking for, when in fact, they were.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Holding on to
your intention throughout both setting goals and taking action is very
important. To have intention for a particular conversation or negotiation, for
instance, is to be laser focused on the desired outcome. If you’re clear on
that, you’ll be better able to recognize any and all available opportunities to
achieve it.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When you’re
going into a situation that you’re unsure of or nervous about, you can apply a
Jedi mind trick and draw confidence from your intention. I’ve learned that when
I focus on positive outcomes and hold the intention for them, good things
happen much more often. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Cs0jWSy8nAY/Vo0tGEas4aI/AAAAAAAAALA/EIZ80_4LQC4/s1600/LukeSkywalker.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Cs0jWSy8nAY/Vo0tGEas4aI/AAAAAAAAALA/EIZ80_4LQC4/s320/LukeSkywalker.jpeg" width="250" /></a></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Carlos: A Story
of the Jedi Mind Trick in Action</b></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As an example,
one of my clients, Carlos, was about to buy a house but felt that the seller
needed to lower the price by £50K (c.$80K) to reflect remedial works that
needed to be carried out. He was anxious about the meeting that had been
arranged, and we discussed it in preparation. I asked him what his intention
for the meeting was.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Well, to get a
lower price,” he said.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Why does the
house warrant a lower price?” I asked.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He explained
about all the work the house needed and how he felt that justified an
appropriate price reduction.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Okay,” I said.
“You know what you want and why. Exactly what is the intention for this
meeting?”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“To get the
seller to approve a </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14.6667px;">£50K</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> reduction in the cost of the property
because I’m going to have to spend that on things that should have already been
done.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Are you
comfortable that that figure is appropriate?”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Yes,” he said.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Right, then,”
I said. “So you know what you want to do with this conversation. Keep that
intention at the forefront of your mind. Your intention is ‘I want this person
to take off </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14.6667px;">£50K</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">’. Go and look the seller in the eye and
think, ‘I want to pay £50K less’, and actually hold the full price you want to
pay in your mind.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Carlos got the
discount, bought the house, did a year’s worth of renovations, and moved in. </span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The FORCE was strong in that one! </span><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-32794589803504902102015-12-23T08:30:00.000-08:002016-01-06T07:18:47.907-08:00Give YourSelf Permission to Have FUN<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1RoJQdmPXAk/VnpmCPcYj3I/AAAAAAAAAAs/qXoDNrI__bA/s1600/skydiving-678168.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="250" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1RoJQdmPXAk/VnpmCPcYj3I/AAAAAAAAAAs/qXoDNrI__bA/s400/skydiving-678168.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you sometimes think, “Well, I just don’t have the time to have fun”, “I don’t want to seem silly or frivolous,” or “Having fun makes no money”?</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">If so, what happens then? Do you have fun anyhow? Or negate that side of you?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">Now consider how you feel after having had a little fun, a good laugh, or a wild dance? How do your mind and body feel at this point? I suspect you might feel lighter, calmer, and maybe even freer.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">Many people feel that having fun is a waste of time or that they shouldn’t be taking the time out. In the conventional workplace, having fun is seen as goofing off or unproductive. Increasingly, however, many of the new companies, especially technology companies like Google and Yahoo! have come to see that it’s good to encourage play and, in fact, it increases productivity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">I cannot tell you how many clients look at me blankly when I ask them what they do for fun. They have no idea, and when pressed to come up with something, they squirm in their seats and often show real resistance to giving themselves permission to even think of doing something for themselves. This is when I ask them to tell me what they used to do for fun when they were younger, less busy and had fewer responsibilities. Finally, they remember something, a flicker of recognition crosses their faces and they visibly relax. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Exercise: Fun</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">What did you use to do that made you happy? Something that was a lot of fun? Is there an element of whatever it was that you could take and blend with your current lifestyle? What would the activity look like now? What actions would you need to take to make this fun activity happen? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11.0pt;">So, are you willing to give fun a go and not feel guilty about it? Many find they’re far more productive at home and work after having had a little fun and are more engaged with those around them. So, why not go out and make fun be your priority this holiday season?</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12484352794115199748noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-26035567578735255922015-01-24T08:09:00.001-08:002015-01-24T08:10:41.674-08:00Exercise: Putting YourSelf First<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Think of a few times</b> when you put other people’s needs before your own or have not done what was in your best interest because you thought something or someone else mattered more than you. Now <b>identify</b> what would have been in your best interest and why. Last, <b>assess</b> whether your actions have truly hurt anyone. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>For instance:</b> Your friend likes this guy and has dragged you to five events this month alone to see him. He has no interest in her, and you’re starting to get embarrassed, but you want to support your friend and you want her to like you. Now she wants you to go to another party. It’s coming up to finals time and you have exams in some of your most difficult subjects. You really should study because you really need to get top grades so you can keep your scholarship. Your usual self, the one that’s telling you that you don’t matter as much as she does, would go to the party. If you did, you would essentially be saying to yourself and others and that you felt your friend’s needs were more <b>important </b>more than yours. This is where the cycle of disrespecting yourself starts, and in doing so, you’re also giving others <b>permission</b> to disrespect you. In reality, your friend has other people to go with (and even if she doesn’t, that’s not your responsibility), and she’s actually just bullying you. It’s up to you to be responsible for how your life turns out, and that exam could be a huge part of that! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, make an <b>inventory</b> of when you put others’ needs first when you probably should have prioritised your own. With just a little insight into when you’re putting others’ worth relative to your own and with some idea about when you can better support yourself, you’ll be able to think and, hopefully, recognise that you matter. You are going to have to make a conscious effort at first. Some frustrations may surface as you realise when you’ve been giving your personal power away, but <b>hold hard</b> and don’t get upset, as it’s just not worth it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><i>Excerpt from "Give YourSelf Permission to Live Your Life", by Priya Rana Kapoor available on </i></span><i style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><a href="http://www.gyspermission.com/">www.GYSPermission.com</a>, <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Give-YourSelf-Permission-Live-Your/dp/145259368X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1397668112&sr=8-1&keywords=Permission+Priya" target="_blank">Amazon</a> and local retailers.</i><br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-qFH2rq466aQ/VMPAygSupFI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/eO5C1oKgpe0/s1600/Party-Time.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-qFH2rq466aQ/VMPAygSupFI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/eO5C1oKgpe0/s1600/Party-Time.jpg" height="250" width="400" /></a></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-61962542435815447162014-11-23T09:24:00.000-08:002014-11-23T09:24:02.630-08:005 Tips for a Happier Holiday Season!<div style="font-family: Helvetica;">
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<a href="http://www.gyspermission.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Pr2JYskmvWY/U2u6MMf3kHI/AAAAAAAAAFE/soswElKXm4A/s1600/CoveronlyJpeg.jpg" height="320" width="218" /></a></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;">I</span>It’s the end of November. Thanksgiving is almost upon us. Christmas is coming. </div>
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Maybe you’re already dreading the turkey and pumpkin pie, the caroling and elves, the tinsel and bows. Maybe for you, Thanksgiving is a solid day spent in the kitchen, wrangling with a quirky oven to not to burn the stuffing, while crowds of family members mill around with growing appetites and shortening tempers. Christmas means a tangle of stress: shopping in heavy traffic, miserable weather, family tension, increased demands at work, an annoying profusion of green and red and “Ho Ho Ho!”s.</div>
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Unfortunately, for many of us, all we have to look forward to from the holidays is stress and failed expectations. We can so easily miss the joy of the season, and all the good things it has to offer. With this in mind, Give YourSelf Permission would like to present you with...</div>
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<b><span style="color: #e69138;">5 Tips for a Happier Holiday Season!</span></b></h4>
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<b><span style="color: #e69138;">1) <i>Take a Break! (GYSP to take care of yourself…)</i></span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Take a fireside, hot chocolate and/or wine evening to yourself. Turn off the TV, silence the phone, set down the iPad and turn on the Christmas tunes. In the busyness of the holidays, it becomes even more crucial to take time to rest. Doing so will make you better equipped to handle the additional demands. Harken to the words of “Winter Wonderland” and do some dreaming by the fire.</div>
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<b><span style="color: #e69138;">2) <i>Let Aunt Viv make the turkey... (GYSP to know your values and delegate)</i></span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>While you’re sitting by the fire, take the time to ask yourself what you want to get out of this holiday season. Identify your values, and act on them. Delegate the cooking responsibilities for the Thanksgiving meal instead of trying to do it all yourself. Don’t do all the Christmas shopping for your mom and siblings, let them chose their own gifts for the family. Identifying your strengths and wants and playing to them, as well as everyone else’s, is the quickest way to bring peace of mind in the hustle and bustle.</div>
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<b><span style="color: #e69138;">3) <i>Send Christmas Cards online (GYSP to be brave, and make a change)</i></span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“Shocking!”, you might say. “They wouldn’t be Christmas Cards without a handwritten address and postage stamp.” However, companies such as American Greetings and Blue Mountain offer simple customizable Christmas eCards without a stop at the post office. Don’t be afraid to take advantage of modern technology and change traditions: this is the 21st century!</div>
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<b><span style="color: #e69138;">4) <i>Watch It’s a Wonderful Life (GYSP to be happy and grateful)</i></span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>This movie is an excellent reminder to live with a mindset of gratitude for all the delights of life. As 2014 draws to a close, look back on the year with a positive outlook, focusing on the highs instead of the lows. Let yourself be happy, and say “Thank you”. This will do worlds of good for your personal satisfaction.</div>
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<b><span style="color: #e69138;">5) <i>Online Shopping (GYSP to build your Dream Team)</i></span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Save gas and time by doing your Christmas shopping online! Amazon and Ebay have skyrocketed in popularity in recent years, and offer fast and affordable (sometimes free!) shipping to consolidate your efforts. Or, better yet, don’t worry so much about buying more things to stockpile in the house––consider giving the gift of an experience: a family night at the movies, a fun date for frozen yogurt, a camping trip, or a girl’s only nails outing. Memories last longer than any wrapped present.</div>
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<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></div>
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From the bottom of my heart, I wish you a Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas. May your holidays be filled with peace, love and joy,</div>
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Warmly, </div>
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Priya xxx</div>
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<i>priya@prkcoaching.com</i></div>
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For more information visit <a href="http://www.gyspermission.com/">www.GYSPermission.com</a></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-54980886395173384292014-10-20T01:37:00.000-07:002014-10-20T01:39:32.761-07:00How does egg freezing work and what are the benefits?Now that Apple and Facebook have decided to pay for egg freezing for their female employees, I thought it might be time to resurrect this piece! What are your thoughts? Would love to start a discussion!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/dQbbLTAM6d8?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-24138053869598255382014-08-27T10:44:00.001-07:002014-08-27T10:44:36.261-07:00Priya Rana Kapoor on Giving Yourself Permission to Live Your Life-Author Talk<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/CltFi7fxLho?list=PLJkbE0Il28Z1N6Bhm__mOqwpEabpslgQy" width="480"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-81579954904427618012014-06-13T04:37:00.001-07:002014-06-13T04:40:45.178-07:00'Give YourSelf Permission to Live Your Life' by Priya Rana Kapoor, Author Video<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/eWHFcc3-0Gw" width="480"></iframe><br />
<br />
For more information visit <a href="http://www.GYSPermission.com/">www.GYSPermission.com</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-89110102478481262972014-05-14T07:55:00.001-07:002014-05-14T07:56:07.032-07:00Why it is Not Selfish to Take Care of Yourself FirstExcerpt from <i><b><a href="http://www.gyspermission.com">"Give YourSelf Permission to Live Your Life"</a></b></i> by Priya Rana Kapoor<br />
Chapter Three: The Permission Journey<br />
<br />
<blockquote><i>We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same. —Carlos Castaneda</i></blockquote><br />
The ultimate purpose of this book is to give you the space, desire, and tools to give yourself permission to live your life.<br />
<br />
Giving yourself permission means allowing yourself to think and do what you think is best for yourself. People consistently balk at this comment. Many of my clients say, “I can’t just think of myself; I have my children to worry about,” or “It’s not all about me; my parents would be so disappointed.” They often worry that they’ll be seen as selfish and often truly believe that they are being self-centred.<br />
<br />
I would like to challenge that thinking. When you go on a plane and the safety announcement says that in case of emergency, you should put on your oxygen mask before helping others. Why do you think they say that?<br />
<br />
Imagine a scenario in which a mother sees her oxygen mask drop in front of her face and knows that the flight attendant has instructed her to put hers on first. Instead, she looks over at her small child and decides to reach for his first. He is vulnerable; he needs her help. She takes the time to unbuckle her belt and reach over. Her son is upset and reaching for her, squirming in his seat. She has to tussle with him before she can pull down his oxygen mask, and doing so has taken a lot of time; too much, in fact. The grim reality is that she could pass out due to lack of oxygen and become incapable of helping him put his mask on. Even if the child is still conscious, he probably isn’t able to reach the mask and doesn’t even know what to do with it. They may both die, utterly needlessly.<br />
<br />
This depressing analogy highlights that it is imperative for you to take care of yourself before helping others, for their sake as much as yours. And that means allowing yourself to figure out what taking care of yourself means. When we take care of ourselves, we make ourselves strong enough to take care of others.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.gyspermission.com"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-CW64Hp5KbSw/U3OCXVwbbGI/AAAAAAAAAFo/ejp5yeb-rPc/s1600/CoveronlyJpeg.jpg" imageanchor="1" ><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-CW64Hp5KbSw/U3OCXVwbbGI/AAAAAAAAAFo/ejp5yeb-rPc/s320/CoveronlyJpeg.jpg" /></a></a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.GYSPermission.com">www.GYSPermission.com</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-2545017043492422202014-05-08T10:17:00.000-07:002014-05-14T07:58:55.254-07:00Sweeping Your Side of the Street Excerpt from <b><a href="http://www.gyspermission.com">"Give YourSelf Permission to Live Your Life"</a></b>, by Priya Rana Kapoor<br />
<i>Chapter Seven: Give YourSelf Permission to Take Back Your Life<br />
</i><br />
I often ask clients if they have “swept their side of the street”. If we envision our lives as a row of houses, we can imagine how each occupant is only responsible for clearing autumn leaves or snow from the area in front of their own property. They might look disapprovingly at the mess in front of the house across the street, but its upkeep isn’t really any of their business, and it certainly isn’t their responsibility. We can always help our neighbours, but we cannot do their work for them. If the mess is in someone else’s front yard, legally we’re not even allowed to go onto their property without permission!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_OXKUUN4RfY/U2u66phZu5I/AAAAAAAAAFY/xfECjlMJVdU/s1600/leaves_on_the_street-851x315.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_OXKUUN4RfY/U2u66phZu5I/AAAAAAAAAFY/xfECjlMJVdU/s400/leaves_on_the_street-851x315.jpg" /></a></div><br />
When issues arise in our lives, we need to ask ourselves if we’ve done whatever is most responsible in the given situation. Have we taken control over those elements that are within our circle of control? Have we done what we’re supposed to do in a way that’s consistent with what we believe to be important?<br />
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When we’re able to take responsibility for our own lives and sweep our side of the street, life becomes more manageable. As we spend less time wrestling with the mess outside other people’s houses, it becomes easier for us to be more authentic as our real selves and to be proud to invite others over for a barbecue in our yard.<br />
<br />
Once I understood that I was making decisions for myself based on others’ circumstances and desires, I started to look around and pay attention to what I would like to do. I decided I wanted to move back to London from Los Angeles. I wouldn’t be a less responsible daughter and granddaughter if I no longer ran around trying to organise every aspect of other people’s lives. In fact, I could be a better daughter and granddaughter by being responsible for myself. I could stop blaming my family situation for the things that I perceived as being wrong with my life, and I could love and support my family members from a position of trust. I could trust them to care for themselves and ask for help when they needed it. I would always be there for them. At the same time, I had to trust in myself to make the decisions that were right for me. It was such a relief to take personal responsibility, to sweep my side of the street and to leave others to maintain their own properties.<br />
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<a href="http://www.gyspermission.com"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Pr2JYskmvWY/U2u6MMf3kHI/AAAAAAAAAFA/VtQyOrIP7vw/s1600/CoveronlyJpeg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Pr2JYskmvWY/U2u6MMf3kHI/AAAAAAAAAFA/VtQyOrIP7vw/s320/CoveronlyJpeg.jpg" /></a></div></a><br />
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<a href="http://www.GYSPermission.com">www.GYSPermission.com</a><br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-28768174164663126422014-04-29T03:37:00.002-07:002014-04-29T03:39:55.918-07:00Don't Compare Your Insides with Everyone Else's Outsides<b>Excerpt from "Give YourSelf Permission to Live Your Life" by Priya Rana Kapoor<b></b><br />
<b>Chapter Ten : Give YourSelf Permission to Have Healthy Relationships.</b><br />
<br />
Often, we look at the people around us and think that they have it better than we do or that they've been given more advantages in the form of privileges and luxuries than we have. We might have feelings of envy, which can be damaging, undermining, and insidious and can only function to make us feel bad about ourselves in the long run.<br />
<br />
When my former husband and I first met, he gave me one of the best pieces of advice I have ever received; I have never forgotten it, and I am often grateful to him for his wise words.<br />
<br />
"Priya, " he said, "don't compare your insides with everyone else's outsides. "<br />
<br />
I think that we've all found ourselves comparing what we know about our lives to what we think is going on with the lives of others. Often we look at their outsides and assume everything is great without considering that there just might be a whole other layer of thoughts, insecurities, hopes, fears, shortcomings, health issues, pain, abuse, wishes, or desires that they don't share with everyone else. When we compare ourselves to all of their glitz, it's easy to see ourselves as coming up short. We look at celebrities or business tycoons, school friends or relatives and think that they've achieved so much more than we have.<br />
<br />
"She has got it all, " we think. "She must be so happy!"<br />
<br />
But what's really happening?<br />
<br />
I suspect most people looking from the outside would have considered my family circumstances pretty much perfect, but, as I've already shared, the apparent fairy tale was quite inconsistent with the chaos we experienced behind closed doors. I rather begrudgingly felt that there were times when people thought, "Oh, the Kapoors have it all! Mum is young and glamorous; Dad is so sophisticated and handsome. Their children are lucky to be growing up in such a cosmopolitan, exciting environment!" In some respects we did have an adventurous life, but it was difficult.<br />
<br />
Maybe your successful boss at work does sit in his fancy corner office all day long and go home at the end of a productive working day to his good-looking, happy wife and children, but perhaps he really wants to be doing something else entirely. Maybe he has high blood pressure from working long hours, constant fights with his wife, and exhausting kids who run riot all evening. Who really knows?<br />
<br />
It's important that we see that we can only truly understand ourselves and that we need to focus on bettering our own lives rather than fixating on others'. With this understanding comes the recognition that, ultimately, we can only learn how to be really happy when we learn how to take personal responsibility for how we live and what we have control over.<br />
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The simple fact is that we just do not know what is going on in most other people's lives. The only person you will ever know completely, inside and out, is yourself.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-h7OZWNcyy_Y/U19_VbeszVI/AAAAAAAAAEo/4h2ZRtstPow/s1600/CoveronlyJpeg.jpg" imageanchor="1" ><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-h7OZWNcyy_Y/U19_VbeszVI/AAAAAAAAAEo/4h2ZRtstPow/s320/CoveronlyJpeg.jpg" /></a><br />
<br />
For more information please visit <a href="http://www.gyspermission.com/the-book.html">www.GYSPermission.com</a><br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-56451858671464086682014-02-27T08:39:00.000-08:002014-02-27T08:46:28.726-08:00Audio Blog Entry on the Benefits of Tenacity!<iframe width="100%" height="450" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/137046672&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&visual=true"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-76738340924514022092014-02-18T07:51:00.001-08:002014-02-18T07:53:55.861-08:00The Beauty and Strength of Collaboration<iframe width="100%" height="450" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/135479974&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&visual=true"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-58047684845473564712013-12-21T07:35:00.000-08:002013-12-21T09:55:34.436-08:00Amazing Peace - Audio Poem<iframe width="100%" height="166" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/125427639&color=ff6600&auto_play=false&show_artwork=true"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-7163032526787420162013-12-06T01:03:00.000-08:002013-12-06T01:04:31.372-08:00Remembering Nelson Mandela<iframe width="100%" height="166" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/123493684&color=ff6600&auto_play=false&show_artwork=true"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-79178820791585882832013-11-26T02:50:00.004-08:002013-11-26T03:04:22.401-08:00Imagination (Audio Blog #2)<iframe width="100%" height="166" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/121960166"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-85807178773239032402013-11-20T00:20:00.001-08:002013-11-20T00:21:14.561-08:00What is the Difference between a LIfe Coach and a Therapist? (Audio Blog #1)<iframe width="100%" height="166" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/120861282"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-3498475854354711792013-11-19T07:35:00.001-08:002013-11-26T09:51:29.942-08:00Intro to New Audio Blog<iframe width="100%" height="166" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/120856638"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-25016163160339033242013-11-19T07:33:00.001-08:002013-11-19T07:37:55.298-08:00Audio Blog Intro by Justin Finkelstein<iframe frameborder="no" height="166" scrolling="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/120861575" width="100%"></iframe>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-90996063605271654272013-05-01T06:47:00.001-07:002013-05-01T06:48:46.042-07:00Who's In Your Family?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We often consider the strength of a person’s character in
terms of his or her relationship to his or her family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Someone with strong family values, who
is close to his or her family, is perceived to have admirable qualities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But we all face diverse experiences,
and our definitions of family are altered by the style of our upbringings.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A year and a half ago, I visited India
for the first time with a stepbrother from my father’s side of the family. My
father was from the Punjab. I had reunited with this brother only three years
earlier and he just happens to be 25 years older than I.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His adult children had connected with
me via Facebook, opening up a whole new side of my family.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My half brother graciously hosted me in New Delhi for two
weeks.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I struggled with accepting
his brotherly love and care, as it was quite foreign to me, but I appreciated
it nonetheless. One day, as we were on our way to visit someone, I asked him
who we were visiting, and he told me that we were going to see “our cousin.” </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Not really our cousin,” I thought
aloud.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But he informed me that we
were indeed going to see my cousin – her father had been my uncle!</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The visit with my cousin was perfectly
delightful, but I felt a slight detachment from this side of my family – this side
of myself.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">These were members of
my family, because we were linked by blood.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But they were not the family I had grown up with, and they
had not contributed as much to my growth and development.</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-pPLCutBR3ag/UYEbQvyICBI/AAAAAAAAADs/tGvw2RcvMqk/s1600/friends_are_the_family_we_choose_for_ourselves-4508.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="285" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-pPLCutBR3ag/UYEbQvyICBI/AAAAAAAAADs/tGvw2RcvMqk/s320/friends_are_the_family_we_choose_for_ourselves-4508.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My mum, sister, grandparents, my godparents and my best
friend Kate and her family have been with me through thick and thin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I learned my most important values from
them, and they shaped the person I became.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The love I received from these people created my foundation.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The closeness I feel to them
shapes my definition of my family – even though I am not related to my
godparents or to Kate and her family by blood.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is no question I think of them as family.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My intern is fond of the idea that friends are the family we
choose.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We are shaped by love, not
necessarily blood, though of course there is great importance in biological
family as well. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Unfortunately, in
some cases biological families are not `always the best people for us.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Those who provide us the love and
support we need through many different times become a different sort of
family.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This family’s love gives
us strength to take responsibility for ourselves and grow forward with
confidence.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ultimately, our family
is whomever we decide it is. </span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-5692830847639109822013-02-06T07:26:00.001-08:002013-02-06T07:26:59.602-08:00Valentine's Day and Our Permission to Love
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I
was never a big fan of Valentine’s Day.
I would host fabulous anti-Valentine’s Day parties with black hearts
hanging upside down from the ceiling, and shame on the person who chose to wear
red or pink. I served margaritas
instead of champagne. They were not dreary singles’ parties – in fact, the
guest lists included couples who appreciated my anti-establishment
mentality. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Cynicism and soppiness of the fourteenth day of
February aside, I’ve recently been pondering the utility of Valentine’s Day for
different people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not only
singles who dread Valentine’s Day – some couples feel overly pressured by it as
well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet certain people do not
only love the holiday, they need it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Valentine’s Day provides for some a necessary outlet to express love and
gratitude in a structured manner.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-M2_JUTGOqV0/URJ1i53wcWI/AAAAAAAAAC0/zOShOSvDBnk/s1600/Hands.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-M2_JUTGOqV0/URJ1i53wcWI/AAAAAAAAAC0/zOShOSvDBnk/s320/Hands.jpg" width="239" /></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Some
of us are more comfortable expressing our love for those around us every
day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But for those of us who are
not, Valentine’s Day provides a defined means of expression.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some may scoff at the contrived nature
of overpriced boxes of chocolates, giant bouquets of roses, fancy watches or
elegant 3-course meals.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But there
is comfort in routines like this, and these offerings can be equally expressive
of appreciation and love as more unconventional gifts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Though means may differ, the love is
equally legitimate.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As
someone who formerly was none too enamoured with Valentine’s Day, I am
sympathetic to some of the issues readers may have with the holiday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I recently came to the realization
that our feelings towards Valentine’s Day have nothing to do with the
materialist aspects or with the pressures of being either single or in a
partnership on this day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our
feelings fall within the realm of our control, and we must take the personal
responsibility that comes along with controlling how we feel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We cannot change the systemic nature of
Valentine’s Day, but we can control how we approach the events of the day and
how we treat others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Love occupies numerous dimensions – it can be shown
not just to partners, but also to co-workers, neighbours, friends, family and
humankind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But sharing love
requires giving ourselves permission to do so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There are difficulties in opening oneself up to others and
feeling secure with such strong emotions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The fears and vulnerabilities attached to expressions of love prevent
many of us from loving fully during the year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Valentine’s Day thus serves as a safe haven where such
expressions are not only encouraged, but expected.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Valentine’s Day facilitates our displays of commitment,
care, support, and appreciation.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know I will feel more fulfilled just showing love to
others on the day, regardless of my connection to them. Humanity is so often caught up in the
intricacies of personal lives that we often forget that we are in this
together. A little positive energy
can enhance the experiences of so many people, and it often takes little more
than a polite “how are you?” and a smile to change the course of a day. This Valentine’s Day, I encourage you
to giving yourself permission to appreciate and show love for ALL those you
care about.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><i>Contributor: Denise Ge</i></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-57729807303858075472013-01-22T06:37:00.000-08:002013-02-04T06:51:06.112-08:00Leadership - Who should we really be leading? <!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica;">In his book "Aspire"
Kevin Hall equates the meaning of a “leader” to that of a “pathfinder”. That really resonates with me. We are
all finding our path in life and sometimes some of us inspire others to come
along for the journey. I believe that we are all leaders in our own lives,
first and foremost. We have a responsibility to lead our own personal journey
before we seek to lead others.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica;">Similarly, if we don't find our
own path then we are not taking responsibility for ourselves. If we do what
other people think we should do, or what we <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">feel</i>
they think we should do, we are allowing them to be responsible for our lives;
they become our pathfinders. This so often happens when people do what they <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">think</i> their parents or society want them
to do and they end up on a journey they didn’t want to be on. They are then
ambling down someone else's path.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica;">Some “leaders” entice people to
follow them by instilling fear – in my opinion they are called tyrants. Once in
a while, however, we find people who are journeying down an amazing path they
have found or created.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
inspire us to walk with them, and we do so, without any feelings of doubt,
resistance or friction. In fact we learn much from them. We walk with them
because we are excited to see what happens and where the path is going to
lead.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Often these people are
looked up to as <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">THE</i> leader but in
actuality true leaders and pathfinders need other leaders to get through the
jungle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-yTkSpkWcZ9s/UP6i-jJd-UI/AAAAAAAAACg/ZG0cVHSyIec/s1600/LibGuides_v3.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><img border="0" height="156" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-yTkSpkWcZ9s/UP6i-jJd-UI/AAAAAAAAACg/ZG0cVHSyIec/s320/LibGuides_v3.png" width="320" /></span></a><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica;">I often visualize the journey of
life as an expedition through a thick, green, lush forest, with hanging trees
and roots to trip over. It’s an
amazing place full of vibrancy and beauty but, at times, needs to be navigated with
care and diligence. Some people hav</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica;">e the vision or knowledge of what is on the
other side and they know what's possible; others are really good with
directions and they are the ones who read the maps, hold the compass and find
the best path. Some have physical strength and experience of the terrain and
know how to choose the right branch to chop aside so the path can be cleared,
and be passable. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica;">So you see we all have our jobs,
within our skill sets, as leaders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In an ideal world we choose the path we want to go on and know the duties
within the leadership team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica;">As I see it – we all have a
responsibility to be the pathfinder in our own lives; if we happen to inspire
others to walk the journey with us then that is a privilege and a
responsibility not to be taken lightly.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #353535;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-9548927583047787802012-12-30T05:09:00.000-08:002013-01-02T07:18:10.677-08:00Make Your 2013 Vision Board - 7 Easy Steps<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;">Simply put, a Vision
Board is a poster size “collage” of images and words which depicts the vision
you have for your life. It is not an arts and crafts project. I encourage many
of my clients, both male and female, to use this technique to access goals,
values, actions and needs they sometimes find difficult to articulate verbally
or in the written word. The Vision Board is the end product of an intuitive and
creative process that can be enjoyed and referred back to when you need focus
or encouragement.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-I1K4oFHqgfQ/UOA6QqgcZEI/AAAAAAAAACI/PPFpl6tSrU0/s1600/photo-52+copy.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-I1K4oFHqgfQ/UOA6QqgcZEI/AAAAAAAAACI/PPFpl6tSrU0/s320/photo-52+copy.JPG" width="320" /></a><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;">I’ve seen articles about what “right” way to make vision board, but I don’t think there
is a right or wrong way, it’s a very individual project and you need to find
the way that works for you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;">The key to a good
Vision Board is be open to whatever comes up, trust your instincts, pay
attention to the process of making it and have fun. I also would say think big,
most of my clients limit themselves by thinking too small.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Step1:</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<u><b>Develop a clear idea of what you want this
specific Vision Board to represent</b></u><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><i> </i>(e.g. work goals for 2013, parenting goals, giving or service goals,
self-care goals, life goals, health goals etc. etc.-or everything together). My
intention was to have a board that represented what I wanted for my work in
2013. I knew I wanted to get my book published in 2013, but there was nothing
too clear beyond that. However by doing the board all the supporting actions
became apparent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b>Step 2: </b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u>Choose about 4 or 5 magazines</u></b><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b><i> </i></b>you think are interesting and relevant to your
2013 goals. Don’t think too hard; just pick the ones which jump out at you.
Also <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>pick a board</u></b> in any colour that
takes your fancy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b>Step 3: </b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><u>Go through the magazines and just rip out the
pages with images, titles and quotes</u></span></b><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"> that speaks to you, or evokes some positive or empowering emotion or
feeling. Also, keep your focus on the intention for the board. In this case
what you want for your life in 2013. Again, don’t think too hard, just keep ripping,
you can always triage later. I would suggest doing this in one sitting to get
momentum. You will know when you have enough material.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b>Step 4: </b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><u>Mock up or find online anything imperative to
the board you did not find in the magazines.</u></span></b><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"> I (tentatively) mocked up a cover of the book and added the desired
publisher’s logo to the cover. I also found a 2013 header I liked and I would
suggest adding a picture of yourself as it puts you in the scenario and vision.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b>Step 5:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><u>Cut out everything you found from the ripped
pages.</u></span></b><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><i> </i>Start to look at what
you chose and see if there is anything that surprises you or if there are
patterns emerging. By looking at some of the phrases I had chosen I started to
see that it was time for me to take real, strong and meaningful action.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b>Step 6: </b></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><u>Start pasting the images onto the board.</u></span></b><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><i> </i>I sometimes find the larger images can anchor
the corners and then smaller images can overlap the larger. Take your time with
this, but I would suggest doing this in one sitting too. You will start to see
themes and groupings and you can paste relevant images together. It really is
up to you and what makes sense to you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b>Step 7:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<u><b>Admire your work</b></u><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;">, focus on your intention and understand what
your actions need to be to realize your goals. Some of the images evoke a feeling
or thought for you but may mean something different to others, but don’t
worry... it’s your board and you can show it, or hide it, from whomever you
please.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If anyone wants to
share their boards with me, I would love to see them. You can email them
to me at priya@prkcoaching.com.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-GB;"><b>Happy Vision Boarding
and Happy Planning!</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-10345861678751769532012-12-16T01:28:00.000-08:002012-12-18T10:50:29.162-08:00A Call to ArmsI watched the news all afternoon, I stayed up late and watched more, then turned on the TV over my morning tea and bagel and watched some more. I was trying to get my head around what happened at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut on that cold near winter’s morning. <br />
<br />
It seems like this sort of person-on-person violence is escalating, but is it really? People have been harming people for millennia in the name of religion, power, land, natural resources and material wealth. This happens everyday all over the world, in fact on the very same day as the sad events in the US, a man entered a primary school in China and stabbed and wounded 22 children. It is reported that several of the children had severed fingers and ears! Are we just seeing more of this because we have access to rapid and numerous forms of communication? <br />
<br />
Then we look at the heartbreaking fact that bystanders on the Time Square subway platform had 22 seconds to help Ki-Suck Han climb off the tracks before he was hit and killed by an oncoming train … but they did not reach out to him. <br />
<br />
I ask myself what is going on? We can blame guns, lack of education, the slackening of moral values, the absence of religion, etc. but I think there is something more fundamental missing. I think we are losing personal connections and support. Whilst I am a huge proponent in my work for personal responsibility, I do also feel that it is a personal responsibility of each and everyone one of us to help our fellow man in the best way we know how. Any little act of kindness will help. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Ee97xtQZXBE/UM2S2MHKm5I/AAAAAAAAAB0/chi6xOmu4Vc/s1600/hug-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="221" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Ee97xtQZXBE/UM2S2MHKm5I/AAAAAAAAAB0/chi6xOmu4Vc/s320/hug-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
This all starts at the grass roots level. And this is why I have called this blog entry “A Call to Arms”. It is our responsibility to reach out a hand to, or put our arms around, those who might need our help or support. Sometimes a hug is all we need. We don’t always need people to fix our problems or issues. We just need to know people care, are around and that we have been "seen".<br />
<br />
People just want to feel safe, and this will be the biggest challenge parents of the surviving children at Newtown will face when supporting their children in the weeks and month to come.<br />
<br />
At the same time, those of us who feel obliged to step up and take a stand against this increasing dissatisfaction and discontent with each other should find ways to be as vocal and as involved as we are comfortable with. It’s time to band together and raise our “arms” and “fight” as “warriors” going into “battle” for a peaceful world.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-561209630940458397.post-19487764254012532372012-12-05T07:52:00.000-08:002012-12-05T07:52:00.699-08:00Giving Without Losing YourselfIn the spirit of the Christmas season, I have been thinking about how we give to others and how we can sometimes lose ourselves in the process. I used to want everything to be “right” at Christmas time. In an effort to make Christmas “perfect,” I used to do all the shopping not only for the presents I would give out, but for my whole family. I started by helping my grandmother buy everyone else’s presents, which I enjoyed and was more than willing to do as she was in her late 80’s, virtually blind and almost bedridden. But then, in an effort to have everyone happy with their gifts, I escalated to buying my mother’s and sister’s presents for everyone in our family, which even included buying my own gifts from them. Not only was I losing myself in all this “giving”, but I was getting resentful. I was also depriving them of the gift of giving. It came from a good place – or so I thought – but in the end, I was miserable because the pressure was too great. <br />
<br />
I find that so many people derive happiness for themselves only when others are happy, and they will do anything to control this situation. In the above example, I wanted everybody else to be satisfied with what they received so I could be happy. I saw it as my responsibility to make everybody happy. However, in truth and with hindsight, it was not at all my responsibility what my sister gave my mother; it was hers. I was getting involved where I really should not have been. <br />
<br />
So, we want to give to charities, others, and our families, but let’s give ourselves permission to give from the heart. Because we <i>want</i> to, not because we think we <i>have</i> to. This makes the experience far more genuine and fulfilling for the giver and receiver. If we feel ourselves giving to prove we are good people, or because we think we have to, then we need to step back and rethink our motives. Who are we really doing this giving for? If it is to quell our anxieties, because we are afraid to say no, or to try to impress others, we are not actually <i>giving</i>. We are taking. <br />
<br />
So this season, give from the heart...because you <i>want</i> to. <br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15788379962226933460noreply@blogger.com0